Watching “Michael Jackson: Leaving Neverland” –
after seething over Wade Robson’s insistence on using the meaningless and misleading phrase “all that sexual stuff”:
he may be, with rare exceptions, unable to say what he means, because he’s running into a mental block, but, speaking as someone who still has his own mental blocks to overcome, that is not actually reasonable behavior! –
My first set of thoughts was:
Ok guys. He groped (masturbated) you (in a “circle jerk” context). And in some cases he sucked you off, or tried to. And in Wade’s case – he tried to fuck you when you were a teenager – NOT when you were a child, when you were a teenager.
So that’s the cause of your paranoia, your anxiety, depression?
How does that – the overwhelming bulk of what Wade and James say was done to them – compare to what was inflicted on my brother and I (and our half-sister, and cousins). If you wonder what I’m talking about. refer to the heavy handed hints in my other two blogs and elsewhere e.g psychcentral. What you say he did, is that in the same category?
Well, yes, the attempted oral sex (Gavin/James) and – especially, obviously – the attempted anal sex (Wade) experiences definitely would be in the same category.
But the actions that were being euphemistically drawn attention to throughout the film? Cha’m’one!
Mutual masturbation. That is not something you live with unpleasant memories of every day of your life.
My second set of thoughts is:
…But wait a minute, what am I saying?!
I’m missing the point!!
Just as surely as the mothers and brothers and wives in the documentary were missing the point.
Taking them at their word…
MJ presented the mutual masturbation and later the attempts at oral and anal sex as “expressions of love” as “part of a loving relationship”.
There is the abuse – in the notions of “love” and “the family”. That is the abuse which the relatives and partners in the documentary are also guilty of.
Firstly – Do not pretend that “physical contact in general” is not in fact also violence. A violation of privacy. Never conflate this with “love”. One thing which needs to be abolished is the pretence that there is such a thing as a physical expresion of “love”. Physical contact is only ever “use”, or as the pious call it “assault” or if it involves penetration in the nether regions “rape”. That is a fact of life. Strip away all the pretense, all the nonsense – what is sex? Sex is a person using another person as a toilet.
Males use/”assault” females, and homosexual males of a certain mindset use/”assault” homosexuals of another mindset. And females can use/”assault” heterosexual males – there’s a common method you might have heard of, the pretentious call it “cunnilingus”.
And all this is nature taking its course – “relationships” are not natural. and everyone knows this intuitively way before they’re able to verbalise it. Free “sex” from any association with “love” and more humans will, in accordance with nature, grow a hard shell around it and carry on.
Secondly – and more importantly – Do not pretend that humans are “social animals”. Do not pretend that we are not in fact solitary animals whose natural inclination is to “individualism”/”survivalism”, is the drive-to, or quest-for, “self-sufficiency”.
The “nuclear family” is inherently abusive – physically and more importantly psychologically.
It’s unnatural. Just like “schooling” is unnatural (it’s “indoctrination” – the very opposite of “education” which at all ages can only be autodidactic/self-induced),
and just like “the State”, the “family” is a power structure – a mechanism by which some exert tyrrany over others, a means of psychological abuse – intimidation, deception, confusion, and retarding of the young person’s natural development.
What was MJ presenting as, to his younger companions? As part of a “family” (for that is what a “lover” aspires to be).
That‘s the appalling part.